I signed up a month or so ago with Match.com. Now I’m sorry to say I paid for something that just does not work. Here is why. I’m not a size 2 so no one has contacted me. People have winked yes.. a whole 2 of them. I have written to a couple of people on this site, nothing back.

Now this is normal for most sites, but here is what sucks about Match, when you sign up and pay for 6 months you CAN NOT get your money back if your unhappy, that’s right, if you find that there site works just like the other free sites out there and it ends up being a waste of your cash you are stuck with the bill. If you find someone in the first week, your still stuck with the bill. It’s bull shit really.

So I have learned my lesson and I will not be signing up for a paid dating site again. If you want to meet someone go hit up POF or go to a bar or bookstore. Online dating is dying because sites are getting greedy and people are too picky online. They want perfection and perfection is just not real.

Has online dating worked, yes, but if you look at most people who have met online and been successful you will see size 10 and under when you look at the women. In the case of Match most men want skinny, even the big guys. I don’t get it, but really their matching features suck as I really think they need to look at what people say they want. All of my matches have wanted skinny girls. They won’t talk to me, so why am I being matched with them?

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I know so many of you may be thinking that Paula Deen is a horrible person, but I don’t see it that way. I see her as a normal person, who acted like a normal person who could not admit they have a problem. I myself have many friends who can’t admit that they are harming themselves, have a disease or are not eating right. This is normal! I think we hold celebrities up as Gods, not what they really are, human and normal.

That said. I love that Paula Deen is a spokeswomen now and is trying to use her popularity and celebrity status to change some lives. Is she perfect, no! She is however the perfect example of most diabetics. I myself am diabetic, if you read this blog often you know that.. I am big on being able to enjoy my food, in moderation. I watch her show, I use her recipes, sometimes I change them so that they are healthier for me, sometimes if it’s a special occasion I don’t.

I hate it when someone tells me I can’t have sugar, but having a ton of bread and pasta is okay. Guess what I have to watch my carbs, not just sugar! You try to live on veggies and meat alone every day for the rest of you life. You probably would go crazy within a week, how do you expect me or any diabetic to do the same? This is why doctors say you can have sweets, just not every day and not a lot. Again moderation. If you see a diabetic eating a candy bar, don’t yell at them, maybe that’s the first candy bar they had in a month.

No one is perfect and since the government doesn’t want to help diabetics we not only have to deal with buying expensive healthy food, medicine and pay for doctors bills, unless you’re a lucky person with insurance that actually covers things, but we have to deal with you. People who have never gone though training, are not diabetic and who tell us we can’t do this or can’t do that. I get that maybe your mom, dad or grandmother had diabetes, but research has changed and so has how it is treated. My grandmother had diabetes I know it’s changed! Unless you are a nurse, a doctor or went to diabetes training in the last year shut up!

So, unless you are diabetic you have no right to judge any of us including Paula Deen. I feel she has now woken up from the denial that many go though and is making some positive changes. Did anyone else notices that over the last three years she’s lost a little weight? Maybe she had made changes and now she’s comfortable sharing her disease with the world. Many diabetics don’t want people to know they are diabetic  because we are looked at as lazy, fat people who eat too much. Newsflash, thin people are diabetic too, both type one and type two! If I were a celebrity I would wait to share this information too. I have noticed though celebrities that are diabetic, but thin, have nothing said about them ever, they can eat what they want and no one says a thing. This is just not right, people need to get over yelling at fat people, maybe then they wouldn’t turn to food for comfort.

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I have just started my masters degree this year and I have been doing a lot of research. I have found that Google no longer is as great as it use to be. In fact am not impressed at all with their new search. Not only does it come up with crap now, but it’s hard to use if you have a slow connection.

I have decided to go back to yahoo, the site I used when I was going to school as an undergrad. Not only do I find what I’m looking for, the sites are not crap and yahoo is very easy to use with a slow connection. Though for me right now that is not a problem.

Google was once a good search, but it seems that Google is so worried about everything else and what everyone else is doing that they forgot something important, real people use their search and maybe they need to concentrate more on how that works and less on everything else.

What are your feelings on the new Google search?

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No this isn’t a new movie, but my life right now. I have been very stressed out over the last few days and even though I have been trying very hard to get though everything that is going on it’s hard. I have decided that I will be making some small changes in my life and one of those is not seeing my friends as often as I have been.

Now, it’s not that I don’t love my friends, I do and I like to spend time with them when they all get along, but it seems that right now they are not and I can not take it anymore! On top of that no one seems to understand that I can’t eat carbs anymore or I hate to say it some of my friends must have no clue what a carb is. Well if you my friend and reading this, it’s what makes me pissy.

There I said it!

Again I love my friends but I need to take care of me, my diabetes and my weight before I even think about trying to help them with their problems. I may die because of mine, they may just be unhappy for a while.

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So yesterday a friend of mine found out she was getting more food stamps because her ex was not paying child support. Okay I kind of get how that would work, but at the same time I don’t. How does $700 a month in food make up for cash? There is no way that 3 people can eat $700 in food it’s just not going to happen.

I’m not complaining about the assistance, she does need the help and it’s a long story, but why not give her cash so she can pay her rent, heat and other things. Food stamps doesn’t by clothing, diapers and keep the electric on. Most people can buy enough food with about $3-400 for the month, I think if the government thinks they need more then that then it should then convert to cash or a voucher to pay for living expenses.

What do you think?

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Today I have decided that I need to start getting rid of bills and paying down what I can’t get rid of. I am now going to change my debt tracker to reflect what I owe besides student loans since those keep adding interest and I’m tired of trying to keep up with it.

My total non-student loan debt is 7,737. Now that may not sound like a lot, but I have offically made $185  this month, my student loan payment is $150. Do the math.

I am selling my car to get rid of the insurance and renewal payments. I don’t want to as I do live in the country, but I have no choice so I will not be getting a job any time soon as I have no way to get there. Maybe 5 years from now I can afford a car but I’m not keeping my hopes up. If I still need money, my bed and sofa are the next to go, then my TV dresser and finally my computer, but I hope it does not come to that.

I am doing what I need to do to survive. My only other option is suicide and well, that won’t help because then there’s a funeral to pay for, so I will not be killing myself just to save my loved one’s from the burden of paying for it.

I blame greedy bankers for all of my problems as they are the cause of my issues. Work is not available because of them and that is why I have problems. Most of my debt was accumulated when I made $1000 a month and could afford it. My business suffered because of their stupidity and greed.  They are still greedy and all I have to say is Karma is a BITCH.

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I have been in contact with a few places recently and I think I can’t find a job because I’m not a man. Yep, I said it, but I have noticed that many of the jobs I have applied to have hired men, not women. Yes they are sales jobs and I have sales experience, but apparently I’m missing something and it’s not experience related at all.

I’m I the only one noticing this, it seems I keep reading that women are actually finding work easier but I really do not think that’s the case. I for one have almost always been turned down so that they can hire a man. Oh well I guess I’ll just have to keep trying.

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