Yesterday I was sick and today I was in pain. I’m not sure what is wrong but I have a huge shooting pain in my chest, it shoots down my arm and my hand and arm go numb sometimes. On top of that I’m dizzy and a little out of it.
Ive been deep breathing and it’s helped a little, but after sitting down with a bottle of wine, don’t worry not the whole bottle, there was just enough to fill half a glass left and I figured why dirty a glass. Anyway, I am starting to feel better now. I did some research and I could have an anxiety problem, I kind of agree with this as a friend of mine just found out that is her problem too, so I know what they said about her signs and what she was experiencing. Too bad I don’t have insurance so I can get checked out too.
The good news is I’m starting to relax and I hope that I can get some sleep tonight. I need rest that has just not shown up yet. I also need a nice long vacation, but I don’t think that will happen any time soon.
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Most people don’t think a lot about home security until it’s too late. My friend had this problem and just a few weeks ago her home was broken into. She was on vacation and had no idea. Her home is not close to any other homes so no one knew anything had happened. She had all of her things taken. They left nothing, the furniture and everything was gone. I believe all she had left was a few books and her mail.
When people live in the country they just don’t believe that something like this could happen, but if you look at how far many of these houses are from one another you can see how they could become prime targets, that and since it doesn’t happen much you don’t think about securing you home. Now my friend is looking into a home security system from ADT so that this does not happen to her again. Right now it’s only $99 to install if you subscribe to the service so it’s a good deal for her. She luckily has insurance that will cover some of the cost, but many things she had are irreplaceable, like her antique desk and jewelry handed down from her grandmother.
In times like these we all need to think about our homes security, people are desperate for money and other items. Many will do whatever they can to get them, including takeing them from you.
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I am still not feeling well. I have been very dizzy for the last few days and I’m not sure why it will not go away. I’m going to give it another week then call the doctor for advice if it’s still going on. I have to be able to drive to school and right now I can’t drive anywhere!
My sister took me into walmart today to get my other meds it’s good timing as my insurance is done in 2 days and I won’t have any until one I either get a job with some or two, I start making a lot more money. It’s going to suck, but there really is nothing I can do about it. I can not afford $200 a month plus co pays.
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I was hoping to get some good news this week in the form of a grant to get a new wig that will actually look like my real hair. Unfortunately the grant money is gone. Probably to a bunch of cancer patents who only needed it for a year or two. Yes I’m a little bitter, Yes they need it too, but when you are looking at people who can walk around bald because they don’t scarring and a blistery rash on their head, you do tend to get annoyed when they get all the help.
I have scarring alopecia. If you want to see pictures click here to check it out, it’s not of me, but you get the point. The first picture is closer to what I have, but mine is all over my head. Pretty much if I walked around I would be teased and pointed at relentlessly. I have had this condition since I was very young, it only started scarring when I was 12. I have lived most of my life with this and I was hoping to be able to get the chance to wear my hair up. Something I have not been able to do for over 10 years. Unfortunately I still won’t get the chance as these wigs or full cranial prosthesis, cost at least $300 plus supplies needed to attach it. Some insurance will cover them, but mine of course will not and it doesn’t look like I can find a plan that will unless I pay $300 a month, the point in that is?
So yes I’m a little bitter as I have to live with my hair loss for the rest of my life, unlike cancer where you either go into remission, die (hopefully not) or it goes away my hair will never grow back. There is no cure. I know I’m going to get people yelling at me because I’m mad at people with cancer, I’m not really mad at them, just the fact they get so much help when it comes to hair loss. While me who has to live with it gets nothing.
Maybe one day I’ll have an extra $300-500 to get one. Then I get to try to save up for when it starts to come apart. I really don’t know how long they are suppose to last. Oh well. I guess I just wear the falling apart cheep wigs I have now, not that i have a choice, I wish I had the choice to walk around with a bald head, I’d do it in a heartbeat if it meant I didn’t have to spend more money on a wig.
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A few weeks ago I was sitting at my desk and my glasses fell off, I picked them up and the frame was broken. I’m guessing my wonderful 6 month old niece did it. She loves to pull on them and I’m sure it didn’t help keep them in good shape. Of course it’s not just her fault her 1 1/2 year old brother did the same thing! I’m also sure just normal wear and tear caused an issue too.
Anyway now I am on the hunt for new eyeglasses that are cheep as it looks like my insurance won’t kick in until after I don’t have it anymore. Nice huh? I have to get new insurance, but I’m not sure I can wait 6 months to do so. I have found a couple of cool sites one that you may have heard of through the Clark Howard Show. The website is Zenni Optical and they have a really cool selection of frames starting at $8 now that I can afford. I found some frames that match what I already have, but I know my prescription is still off so I guess I have to wait until I can get that done to order anything.
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Today I called my insurance company to find out if I had coverage for a full cranial prosthesis, pretty much a very nice expensive wig. I have to wear one as I have scarring alopecia and really don’t have a choice if I want to go out in public without people staring or getting grossed out. I should have known better then to get my hopes up. Once again I wanted something and now I can’t have it. They told me it’s not covered.
I had also decided a yesterday that I would pay off some bill instead of get a laptop. Well my computer once again reminded me why I need one as it crashed yet again because of the bad video card. Unfortunately I can’t take out the card as then the computer does not run well at all, pretty much no internet for me if I remove the card.
So now I’m back to getting the laptop, that yes I still want, but I want the house more, I can’t get the house unless I can improve my credit score. The score that was okay 2 days before I called on the mortgage, but spiraled downward when I tried to apply. Apparently they have updated the scoring method because nothing has changed on any of my reports.
I’m thinking it’s time to give up and realize I will be paying almost $600-800 a month to get to school as I can’t even rent a place because of my credit. I just don’t understand how that works I can pay that much to get to school, but I can’t pay a $200 mortgage? I guess it’s just time to give up on everything, I may even have to quit school. How fun is that?
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Yesterday I was talking to a friend of mine about her new car she is getting. He old one broke down and will cost at least $5000 to fix. So she decided to just get a new, more eco friendly car. She was also looking to switch insurance companies and had been getting an auto insurance quote from a local insurance dealer. She told me later on that I was lucky I didn’t have to pay for insurance since I owned my car. I laughed and informed her that here in Michigan I have to have insurance and it’s cost me about $122 a month.
The bad part about all of this is that her full coverage was only about $40 more then my PLPD. The reason being is that they have to keep the rates low in other states that don’t require insurance. It sucks for us because that $122 a month could really help me pay some other bills.